What About The Children?

What About The Children: A post about the inefficacy of the judicial system in regards to domestic violence

I spent yesterday afternoon at a parenting seminar.

Correction: I spent yesterday afternoon at a parenting plan seminar.  Because I am supposed to be preparing to design a co-parenting plan with the man who beat me, raped me, robbed me of the last few years of my childhood, and possibly even caused my son’s autism.  And I am supposed to be doing this because he feels like it.  And the fact that he feels like it matters because according to our judicial system, even a father who spent the last nine years completely neglecting his nine year old autistic son, who has never paid and still has not offered to pay a dime of child support, and who was charged with “Assault 4,” which  means physical assault against a pregnant woman, even that guy has the right to make claims on his biological child.

There are a lot of things to celebrate about our judicial system.  This past week, a judge from my hometown used the judicial system to salvage the lives and families of thousands of innocent people who were being detained and deported due to Donald Trump’s unconstitutional, anti-Muslim executive order.  My abuser spent four years in a state prison because of our judicial system, and although I believe he deserved much more time, there are some countries in which he would have received no punishment at all.  Some states, even.  So I will concede that the judicial system can do a lot of good.  But the lack of protocols in place to combat domestic abuse via Family Law court is an enormous failing, and one which is destroying my life.

Continue reading